It's finally over. Now, all I feel is serene nonchalance. It's time to move on to the next chapter of my somewhat miserable, yet strangely fascinating life.

I'm...very nonchalant about my CGPA. This quiet acceptance of whatever results thrown my way after all the crap I went through, all I wished for, all I needed, was for everything to be over. What has been done, has been done. There is nothing I can do to change history.

Regrets be many. Things I can't change be many.

Moving forward be what I can do.

Tonight I rest. Tomorrow, I do what I must do.

Someday I will be gone from this world. When that time comes, I do not want to say "I have many regrets." No. I want to say "I just want to move on to another adventure in the next life."

PUDDING'S PHOTOBOOK

http://fuckyeahd2boys.tumblr.com/post/51115895683/yamada-yuukis-first-photobook

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

PUDDING'S PHOTOBOOK ON 25 JULY

I WANT

I WANT

I WANTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

FIRST D2 MEMBER TO GET IT TOO

OMFG

this is marvelous indeed

http://nobodyxaldyn.tumblr.com/post/50643256417/what-are-your-thoughts-on-gokaiger-marvelous

GOKAI PUNS HELL YES *JOINS IN THE FRAY*

I...have absolute pitch.

Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absolute_pitch

Generally, absolute pitch implies some or all of the following abilities, achieved without a reference tone:

• Identify by name individual pitches (e.g. A, B, C♯) played on various instruments.
• Name the key of a given piece of tonal music.
• Reproduce a piece of tonal music in the correct key days after hearing it.
• Identify and name all the tones of a given chord or other tonal mass.
• Accurately sing a named pitch.
• Name the pitches of common everyday sounds such as car horns and alarms.

I can do all that is mentioned above. Yes, even the pitches of car horns and alarms. I thought it was some band nerd thing - apparently it's not.

Seriously?

SERIOUSLY?

AFTER MY PRESENTATION??!! ONE FREAKING HOUR AFTER MY FINAL PRESENTATION?! GIVING ME THE EXCUSE THAT YOU THOUGHT MY PRESENTATION WAS AFTER 15 MAY?! I HAD MENTIONED NOT ONCE BUT TWICE THAT MY PRESENTATION WAS ON 14 MAY. I DID SAY MY EXAMS ENDED ON 8 MAY. THE FINAL MEETING SHOULD HAVE BEEN 13 MAY.

I RECEIVED NO UPDATES. NONE AT ALL. I DIDN'T WANT TO POKE THEM BECAUSE I WAS BUSY PREPARING MY SLIDES AND WORKING ON A BRAND NEW APP THAT TOOK ME 4 DAYS INSTEAD OF 3.

REGRETS? PLENTY. WHAT CAN I DO ABOUT IT? NOTHING. MY GRADES ARE AT STAKE. WHO'S GOING TO COMPENSATE FOR MY GRADES? WHO'S GIVING ME A JOB AFTER I GRADUATE?

WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE RESPONSIBLE? JUST BECAUSE I'M MERELY AN UNDERGRADUATE SLAVING MY LIFE AWAY AT FYP, YOU THINK I'M THAT FREE AND HAVE NO DEADLINES AND ASSIGNMENTS?! YOU THINK YOU CAN GIVE ME LAST MINUTE STUFF AND EXPECT ME TO RUSH EVERYTHING IN TIME? I GAVE A DEADLINE. I WAS TOO LENIENT WHEN YOU REQUESTED FOR AN EXTENSION, BECAUSE I KNEW YOU WERE BUSY. BUT ONE MONTH JUST TO GET BACK TO ME? AND THEN YOU WASTED MY TIME BY STARTING ALMOST HALF HOUR LATE AND DRAGGING ON WHEN I ALREADY SAID I HAD LESSONS AT THIS CERTAIN TIMING OR MEETING AT THIS TIMING.

IF ADULTS BEHAVE LIKE THIS IN THE WORKING WORLD CAN I SAY FUCK YOU ALL THOSE WHO CAN'T EVEN BE ON TIME AND EXPECT US KIDS NOT TO BE LATE FOR SCHOOL? HYPOCRITES, ALL OF YOU.

I really really detest humanity even more. Feel free to kill each other off with nuclear bombs, then we don't need to bother about the rising human population.

http://astrolocherry.tumblr.com/post/48435229557/zodiac-expression-of-nerves

I am both a Leo and Virgo so I probably have experienced both.

Well, in that sense I do have my sense of pride, and I get annoyed when my pride is wounded. Annoyed and stubborn. But at the same time, I don't think highly of myself. It's not that I've low self-esteem, more like I don't really care? I am confident in what I can do, that's all. How you want to judge me is your own bloody problem. No matter how "friendly" or how "open" I am towards close friends and relatives, I am still a cold-hearted bastard at the core. A bastard to people, and a bastard to myself.

Plus, I do not think I look like a girl. I don't think I'm that androgynous either - I think androgynous people are like, if they're female for instance, they'll look good as the intended gender whether they are dressed up as males/crossplaying male characters or when they're themselves/cosplaying female characters. I'd say I tip the balance slightly on the male side hence I don't call myself androgynous? My whole build is tall, lean, lanky, skinny, with large hands and sharp features (and flat chest) and you can see the veins on the back of my hands from previous weight-lifting (of the tuba duh).

Just reading these above paragraphs, it seems like I've low self-esteem and am not comfortable with myself and all that jazz. I assure you that's not the case - I just don't like to assume too much of myself. I am confident when I need to be, and when I know I am. I see no point putting myself across as someone who is all-rounded, even though I aim to be an all-rounded individual (pertaining to mum's expectations in fact). But I know my own strengths and weaknesses.

I feel like dying.

So many changes to do because I'm building 1 year's worth of work in 2 days. And the stupid program isn't resolving my errors. Go die you unresponsive piece of shit.

And nope I didn't receive anything from them. Not even an app name, not even an icon. I don't have time to waste so I just went ahead and created a new app, this time to implement the new changes.

I look at the shit load of codes I need to copy over and my eyes just rolled.

=====

I have a good reason not to cry anymore - recently my tears are stinging my eyes, even if I were yawning and trying to blink sleep from my eyes. It....stung.

Speaking of sleep, the past two days I had bizarre dreams/nightmares.

Wednesday night: We were in Shingeki no Kyojin world. My relatives and friends were all trying to evacuate on carts, and then I saw my relatives being picked up from the carts by titans like M&Ms. The semi-conscious me was debating whether to let the dream me go into a frenzy and do some stupid heroic act like killing titans with my bare hands, but I decided to let it be that the cart just hurried forward, the remaining survivors looking back grimly. I realised none of us were very horrified, not even screaming our heads off. Dream self was in fact rather collected, a serious look of determination on my face to vow revenge and all that jazz.

Thursday night: We were in a....holistic place? I was on the upper floor, sitting down and occasionally glancing at the lower floors. Then a guy wearing robes stood outside asking to be invited in. The host, not suspecting anything, did as he requested. And the guest suddenly spoke in a decidedly evil voice "Sanctuary has been breached!" He transformed into a Horror and unleashed swarms of minions which came in from the front door and started killing people. One of them flew up to the upper floor where I was and attacked the people near me. It turned towards me and bared its deadly fangs at me. For the first time in my dream world, I actually felt death in my face and fervently wished not to be killed just like that. Again, I was collected and refused to back down in the face of death, but yeah.

http://www.orendsrange.com/2012/10/kaizoku-sentai-gokaiger-originally.html

This is inspiring. Such a strong message which gave hope to the Japanese after the tsunami.

I love Gokaiger. I really do. Reading how the past actors voluntarily wanted to be involved just made me love the series even more. If not for Gokaiger I wouldn't know much about the past rangers.

One of the best compliments I can ever receive is "Your sarcasm is top class Kris".

Why thank you. No I'm not being sarcastic here. I am flattered really, haha. Because I crack sarcastic jokes and cold jokes, either to liven things up or just to show my distaste in the issue at hand. If you can't help snorting at them, my mission is accomplished. At least I made you feel better. If you tell me to stop it in some irritating tone, why I'll just continue and make sure to annoy the hell out of you.

I'm not a sensitive person, but neither am I insensitive. Why do I want to be insensitive about things when I myself have experienced the same feeling at least once in my life? Same feeling, different cause mayhaps.

Hmm, things got worse in fact, when more people decided to contribute to the cyberbullying by reblogging the victim's personal pictures and calling them ugly names and saying how ugly and fat she is and all the shit. Well, I...such dedication to shame someone. Wow. I am floored, for lack of better words. Really, the fact these bullies actually take time to surf the blog and reblog posts just to shame and bully the victim, I have to wonder just how much time they have to do these things.

Humanity what humanity

I don't get fandom seriously.

Why can't people imagine gay characters as hetero? ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU GUYS THINK ALL GUYS ARE GAY ANYWAY EVEN IF THE SERIES ISN'T EVEN BL. I don't get you. We can fantasize straight/non-implied homo guys as gays, but not the other way round? Wow, the extend of your narrow-mindedness astounds me.

I saw this on tumblr and seriously, telling people to die over a fandom is so immature. Dude, that's taking things way too far. I'm quite sure if I got told to commit suicide on a rather serious note (actually, I have. Over matters not related to fandom), I'll tell him/her "Not after I bring you down with me. I mean, why should I die when you're still alive?" Dude, I jokingly tell people "Go die", but it's merely an act of being tsun and we all know it's not to be taken seriously.

Honestly, fandumb has its limits. Telling a stranger to die when you don't even know him/her, who died and made you god? Well, I'm pretty sure you might need to annihilate more out there because this person you're picking on won't be the only one.

I'm sure picking on one person just because you dislike what said person did is mature. Very mature indeed.

http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?id=1649386

The pokemon gijinka fanart done by this artist is really pretty. Reminds of touhou fanart, but hey, the costumes are pretty and we're not complaining. I am staring at Darkrai, but I'd rather do the male version which I once found.

Still, I'm a bit skeptical of gijinka. I don't know how Suppi will turn out. If anything, I'd rather cosplay toku characters.